Most of us don’t really have much by way of limits on our behavior, aside from the ritual ones imposed by the source of power or those imposed by our need to at least consider PR. Some, though, have a more awkward issue: the fact that most of the eyes watching them from behind the Wall belong to children. And yes, I realize more and more often that these are the same eyes that end up resting on increasingly violent or risque material, but… well, there are still standards to be kept in order to minimize the chances of dying in an unpleasant ironic offscreen manner. And just avoiding overdoing it isn’t enough; it’s equally important not to come off as some harmless poodle-poking caricature! The first thing to keep in mind is the don’ts. As with that part of our audience, we have to put up with a lot of them.

Don’t push the rating too far. Keep the visible blood to a minimum, and for the love of the Dark Powers don’t revel in it too much (death you might be able to get away with, but blood is apparently a hot-button issue), avoid swearing unless you plan on ducking away from the original word at the last second, don’t make explicit sexual threats—you know, those things that keep the rating and the Dark and Gritty Quotient relatively low. If these things must be done, don’t do them yourself if you can help it—that’s what minions are for—and if you must do them yourself, try to avoid doing them onstage.

On the other hand, you don’t want to push yourself too far into the Clearly Cartoonish Caricature mold either. Unless you’re in a parody-’verse—or possibly particularly if you’re in a parody-’verse, as this sort of behavior seems to be more the tendency of villain-ish protagonists with redemption plot-arcs—try not to confuse being bad with being evil. The world will not remember you for walking on the grass in defiance of the sign, nor for relieving babies of their candy. Admittedly, you might get some credit for particularly unusual or adept maneuvers like somehow managing to take a bite out of every chocolate in every sealed box in an entire store, but the only prizes you’re guaranteed there are for the originality of your sin, and let’s face it, that badger has already been poked.

Similarly, unless you’re willing to be the Bizarrely Competent Hammy Ham To End All Hams and make that your schtick, in which case you’d better work on your overacting and/or acquire a team of ninjas to do the dirty work while you’re playing diversion, you probably don’t want to spend too much time on evil for evil’s own sake. Yes, I realize we used to be able to do it. We also used to be able to avoid drowning in angst, getting taken for rides by deceptive protagonists, and… look, times are changing, all right?

Once you know what not to do, you can start figuring out what you can do—but it’s best to start policing yourself first, and get all your habits in place. Watch yourself, and I’ll see you next week!